For many teenagers, school feels like a place of constant judgment and evaluation, a major source of the pressure that leads to burnout. A clinical psychologist explains how parents can help shift their teen’s experience from feeling constantly evaluated to feeling genuinely supported by their school community.
Clinical psychologist Meghna Kanwat highlights the importance of helping a teen “maintain [a] strong school connection (so the student feels supported rather than simply evaluated).” This shift in perception is critical for their mental well-being.
Parents can start by reframing the purpose of school in their conversations. Emphasize learning, growth, and connection over just grades and rankings. Encourage your teen to see their teachers as resources and mentors, not just as graders.
Proactive communication is key. Help your teen feel comfortable approaching teachers for help or clarification. You can even role-play these conversations with them. This builds self-advocacy skills and reinforces the idea that the school is there to help them succeed.
Parents can also foster this supportive connection by getting involved in the school community in a positive way. When a child sees their parent has a good relationship with the school, it can reduce their own feelings of being in an adversarial environment. By working to build these bridges, parents can help transform their teen’s school from a place of pressure into a community of support.